so high

I hate that sometimes, I have absolutely nothing to do (that's not true, I have a lot, and just don't want to), and other days, I'm running around nonstop. By now, you would've thought that I'd have worked on balancing things out better.

It's weird. The last month of my freshman year is approaching, and I have very mixed feelings about it. The other day, one of the officers in Caliber asked me if I was graduating, to which I replied that, on the contrary, this was only my first year here. The surprised reaction I got was kind of satisfying, to be honest. I know that sounds stupid and self-absorbed of me. But it's not the first time that someone thought my physical age and everything else didn't quite line up. The same night, I smoked with a person I never thought I would end up with. They took me to the woods behind one of the lecture halls, rolled a few joints, and we just talked - about experience, about substance, about history. It was comforting. And, they too told me they couldn't believe I was really the age I was.

Like, shit. That means a lot to me.

+ other little things:

*applications are tedious
*but at the same time, I have a feeling these opportunities are gonna be worth it
*people confuse me on a daily basis
*I need to stop sleeping in
*the picture above is from the same cafe, at the same table, as a few posts ago
*which probably says something about me, though idk what
*quality > quantity
*keep going, keep going, keep going
*the highlight of my day was good lemonade
*and seeing waxahatchee live on sproul
*and sometimes, that's really all you need to get through a rough patch like this

(edit at 11:37 pm)

*also had a meeting over coffee with some folks about our zine project
*then got really high
*and just had the sweetest cheese pizza ever
*so I guess today actually turned out pretty ok